The Expression Hub

Since 7th of this month, the week of love or the buzz up to the so called Valentine’s Day has started. Every year, this week invokes a mixed bag of emotions in me. Sometimes, I just feel excited thinking about the fact that Valentine’s Day is around the corner. Love is in the air for everyone and feel happy for all the people who get to spend time with the people they love. Other times, I do feel angry that this is a day which is simply a hype and everything is just a business. This is true for every festival but it feels more during this week. Every business just cashes on the idea of love which feels really outrageous. From cakes to balloons to flowers and what not, everyone just wants to cash in and have their voices heard during this week. What is supposed to be a pure emotion becomes a commercial for businesses and a super difficult thing for singles like me.

The reason is simple while all the couples around the world are busy making their love stories or are trying to bring their love stories to fruition, people like me who are just wondering or haven’t received or found love feel bad at times. Every time, this week springs up, the most affected are the ones who are single . Believe me, this one I speak from experience. Not that we do not love ourselves or hate ourselves for who we are; but we are also humans right? We also do have something called emotions and long to have that one person or maybe a special group of people who understand us without having to speak much.

Lucky and fortunate are those who do not have to battle their inner demons on a daily basis or have someone on their side and reassure them that everything’s going to be fine. People like me who are singles and hopeless romantics just keep wishing and then dissing it off as if it is going to be real.Again, the reason is not lack of self love or something. The reason is we raise ourselves to be hyper independent so even if someone is willing to help us out, we feel we need to have that repaid in some or the other way. And don’t get me started on a person who falls in love with me or actually wants to. I either push that person away or have serious doubts. But that doesn’t mean people like me do not long for love. People like me fall in love with characters that exist in fictional life or are too good to exist in the real world. Not that we doubt the people in real life because people do find love and sometimes I do wonder how ?But I guess my standards for love is pretty high. People like me long for a love which kind of brings out the best version in you. A love which is reassuring and not abandoning in nature( we do get hurt a lot of times when someone you love or are about to fall in love either ghosts you or abandons you leaving you alone to gather the pieces and put them back together.)A love which makes the other person feel scared to lose us and vice versa. A love which does not hurt and stands strong even if things are difficult. But in today’s world where it is easy to find lust and difficult to find true love, things do seem a bit difficult. But for those who truly understand they never leave their closed ones behind. Instead they make them realize what they are worth .

Thank God , I do have such people despite having a very complex mind. I am super grateful for all the lovely people. But sometimes I do wish people who would love to fall in love in whatever capacity can you do that on a deeper level instead of just being superficial? I don’t do things half-heartedly and put in the efforts wherever I can or do sense genuineness. Else I have a piece of advice- do not even try to make a bridge or stay away. There is a simple reason to this- I am not everyone’s cup of tea. Though I am a nice person but I can be a complete ******* or a ***** depending upon how you treat. And believe me I am not apologetic for the way I behave most of the times because I prefer being authentic rather than being a fake . Also, someone has aptly said,”Your opinion of me does not define who I am.”

So, whether its the Valentine week or some other week as long as I love myself and have some of the greatest people who act as life support , I think I should do fine even though I might be a single or might not have someone exclusive. It is because of these people I can be my authentic self and love myself the most. Also, three cheers to that self love even though people like me have to fight their battles alone internally and externally.